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Are we back to “Normal?” We hope not.

June 10, 2021

In Massachusetts, the COVID-19 pandemic state of emergency is over. For those who chose to get vaccinated, this means much of life can return to normal: dining out, shopping, visiting with friends and family, and giving hugs. As we move forward into this post-pandemic world, it’s not uncommon to hear, “I’m so glad things are getting back to normal.” However, it would be unwise to assume that everything is going to return to the way that it was. Technological innovation, for example, has permanently changed the way we work, go to school, socialize, and connect. And this integration of technology into our everyday lives will continue to expand—along with the associated risks.

This year, we have been diligent in addressing the increased risk of online sexual exploitation, as our children—and sexual predators–have spent more time online now than ever. The numbers of newly reported cases of child sexual abuse by the National Center for Missing and Exploited Children, as well as the Federal Bureau of Investigation, have only continued to climb since the onset of COVID-19. There has also been a surge in childhood exposure to internet pornography and unsolicited child sexual abuse material in their online interactions. These issues will pervade during what we had dubbed the “new normal,” and we urge you to keep the conversation open and ongoing.

One of the amazing things we at Children’s Cove experienced during the stay-at-home order was the sense of community online and a willingness to reach out for help. In response to this significant call for action, we launched our #IU2U, It’s Up To You, campaign, which included a commitment that parents and children discuss together to focus on the importance of their online safety, called The Pledge. We also started a new video series, kicked off by our Virtual Block Party event on April 27, during Child Abuse Prevention Month, which can be found on our YouTube channel. We have implemented these programs and resources because we know there is a demand for them. The risks for children online and in their digital lives are only going to increase. Just like body safety, discussing online safety is equally important for children now, and setting that tone for the future as well.

Please, take the time to have the conversation with your children about body safety AND online safety. Have these conversations early and often. We are excited that we can reconnect and reengage with our community, but there are some elements of returning to normal that we do not want back. We do not want to continue to be reactive to abuse after its happened. Instead, we hope to make the shift to being more proactive in the prevention of the child sexual abuse and advocating for our children’s health and safety, both in-person, and online.

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Summer Planning Safety and Prevention

May 17, 2021

It is May; birds are singing, the bees are emerging and buzzing, flowers are blooming, and spring is more than in the air. However, what is beginning to creep into the minds of parents is: summer break! Last year guidance from the state made many summer camps and programs either unable to open or offer day programming only. With many parents working from home, a lot of children did not go to programming over the summer. With the successful roll out of vaccines increasing, reopening plans emerging, and many aspects of life returning to “normal”, the opportunity for increased summer programming for children also seems to be a reality. Whether you are looking into programs and activities for your child, or if you are a friend or family member of someone who is, we ask you to invite a question in your search: “how seriously does this program take the safety and prevention of child sexual abuse?”

Yes, we know, this is probably not on your top 10 list. Price, hours of programming, overnight vs day, are there swimming or sailing lessons are typically more in the minds of parents and caregivers. However, how an organization responds to emergencies should be part of this decision making, and discussed by camps and programs. But rarely do organizations openly discuss their prevention strategies, protocols, and procedures regarding child sexual abuse. There are many reasons this happens; the belief that it doesn’t happen, the increased pressure for focuses elsewhere, the excessive requirements for compliance from oversight boards in other areas, and stigma. However, this should not detract from an organization’s responsibility for the protection of the children in their care.

As we discussed in March, we believe that every child serving organization has an inherent responsibility to address child sexual abuse. However, without the pressure beyond required minimums there is no other force to ensure organizations are following through on the prevention of child sexual abuse: except for the parents and caregivers who send their children to their programs. As with many other instances in our society, the power of the consumer of services and products share a collective voice. If there is a large enough voice addressing the need for safety, prevention and dialogue about child sexual abuse, we will make a community that is safer for children and deny the ease of opportunity for predators to work in child serving organizations.

When looking into summer programs and camps this year, here are some questions you could add as a part of your process:

• “What type of training does your staff receive to recognize and respond to possible sexual abuse?”
• “What are your reporting guidelines for alleged sexual abuse involving a staff member?”
• “Do you allow staff members to be alone with children?”
• “Do you have a copy of the staff handbook I can review for your procedures and guidelines?”
• “What background checks do you have in place for your staff during hiring?”
• “How are children kept safe and given privacy during times they may be changing, showering or using the restroom?”

These questions are no different than inquiring about protocols around sports, swimming, archery, working with animals, or science: they are about safety. Parents and caregivers cannot take the risk of not knowing what child serving organizations are doing to keep their children safe, as much as the organizations themselves cannot take the risks of making it easy for predators to enter their employment. Mutual accountability, transparency and discussion is how we reduce the stigma and increase the safety for children. These approaches are how we will create a community where children are free of abuse, have a voice that is heard, and where they enjoy healthy, safe, and empowered lives.

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If We can Protect Ourselves from the Pandemic, Why Can’t We Protect Our Children from Sexual Abuse?

April 15, 2021

As we continue to vaccinate and emerge from the darker days of the COVID-19 pandemic, I take pause to think about how our perceptions and behaviors have changed, possibly for good. When I watch TV or movies, for example, with folks crowded together in tight spaces not wearing masks, I can’t help but shudder and think, “Too close!” Similarly, if I leave the house without a mask or hand sanitizer, there’s a slight onset of panic. We all have adopted basic safety behaviors to protect ourselves and our neighbors from COVID-19. We have changed the way we live and our perceptions about risk to stay safe. We know what to do prevent it, and most of us have done so.

But what have we done to prevent child sexual abuse?
The answer is simple: not enough.

The casualties and fallout from COVID-19 are devastating and tragic. There is no question about that. But so, too, are the statistics about child sexual abuse. Research shows that one in four girls, and one in six boys are sexually abused before their 18th birthdays. Most victims suffer in silence, as it is estimated that more than 90 percent of abuse victims never report what happened to them. Are we are going to continue to let this happen?

What if we only knew about 1 in 10 cases of COVID-19 infection? What if we had no way to detect it other than by self-report, and there was no such thing as contact tracing? We might all still be in lockdown, without a vaccine, and infections would continue to surge. We must apply this same rationale to stopping the incidence of child sexual abuse.

If we can find a way to protect ourselves from a pandemic that has killed millions of people this year, we can absolutely find a way to protect our children.

April is National Child Abuse Prevention Month, which is why we are urging our community to come together to make a difference. We ask that parents and caregivers have the conversations about body safety, regularly and often, with their children, their families, and friends. This includes which parts of their bodies are private, not to be touched by anyone, and reminding them they need to immediately tell an adult they trust if someone does touch them inappropriately. If parents and caregivers have concerns that a child isn’t safe, they must reach out for help. It can be awkward, but it’s necessary. It can prevent child sexual abuse.

Adverse childhood experiences leave a lasting impact on children that may follow them for a lifetime. Per the CDC, these experiences can increase the risks of injury, maternal and child health problems, teen pregnancy, involvement in sexual exploitation, and a wide range of chronic diseases and leading causes of death, such as cancer, diabetes, heart disease, and suicide. By shining a light on these “taboo” topics, we can remove stigma and foster change. We have learned that changing our perceptions, responses and behaviors is effective in quelling a pandemic, and the same thing is true for our behaviors and perceptions surrounding child sexual abuse.

Even in these challenging times, we can work together to create a community where children are free of abuse, have a voice that is heard, and where they enjoy healthy, safe, and empowered lives.

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