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Jacob Stapledon

MDT Highlight – Autumn Zerendow

February 10, 2021 by Jacob Stapledon

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MDT Highlight – Autumn Zerendow

Jacob Stapledon

February 10, 2021

The impact and support children and families receive at Children’s Cove is only possible by our partnership and collaboration with committed members of what we call the multidisciplinary team (MDT). They are the professionals who often work behind the scenes, and rarely get the attention or credit they deserve. Most of the time they don’t want it, choosing to work silently and diligently protecting and serving our children.

Autumn Zerendow, M.Ed, LMHC

Director of Adult, Child & Teen Community Based Services and Rape Crisis Program Services at Independence House

Autumn moved to Cape Cod three years ago, after completing a master’s degree program at Cambridge College in Mental Health Counseling. Prior to her role at Independence House, Autumn worked in a variety of settings, including a crisis stabilization unit, a mobile crisis team providing psychiatric evaluations, an adolescent eating disorders unit, and a residential treatment for transitional-aged youth. At Independence House, Autumn provides oversight to their community-based programs, such as the 24-hour hotline and their social media and chat services. She also supervises 12 team members who provide advocacy and counseling.

If a person feels heard and respected…that is a success.”

When asked how she keeps her energy and spirits up in this essential line of work, Autumn cited her belief that every person deserves to live a life free from the experience of domestic and sexual violence. This, she says, is a foundation to her work and drive. “We celebrate the small successes within our work here at Independence House, even during difficult times,” Autumn said. “If a person feels that they are heard and respected by our staff, that is a success. If they show up for counseling and advocacy, which can be a scary thing to do, that is also a success.”

When Autumn is not providing clinical services and oversight as a team member at Independence House, she enjoys photography as a hobby. She learned photography after taking time to travel for an extended period, visiting 6 of the 7 continents.

Every person deserves to live a life free from the experience of domestic and sexual violence.”

Autumn’s work in coordinating counseling services for Independence House’s teen, child sexual assault and children exposed to domestic violence programs has been incredibly important in our capacity to provide mental health referrals to the children, teens, and families seen at Children’s Cove. Autumn’s collaboration with our Mental Health Coordinator Kristine Monteiro has been an invaluable part of our ability to connect children and families with these essential services. Autumn also recently joined our CSEC steering committee. Our relationships with mental health providers like Autumn, and the counselors at Independence House, are one part of how we create a community where children are free of abuse, have a voice that is heard, and where they enjoy healthy, safe, and empowered lives.

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Filed Under: MDT

The Top 10 Things You Need to Know About Child Trafficking in Southeastern Massachusetts

January 19, 2021 by Jacob Stapledon

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The Top 10 Things You Need to Know About Child Trafficking in Southeastern Massachusetts

Jacob Stapledon

January 19, 2021

This article, it’s data and information included was written with input and information provided by team members from Children’s Cove, the Bristol County Children’s Advocacy Center, and the Plymouth County Children’s Advocacy Center.

In 2020, the Children’s Advocacy Centers for Cape Cod & the Islands, Bristol County and Plymouth County provided support and response services to approximately 280 child victims of human trafficking. Children in our communities, including Yarmouth, Westport, Fall River, Hingham, Brockton, Falmouth, Rochester, and Dartmouth, were identified as victims of sexual exploitation and human trafficking. Over the last several years, the child advocacy centers (CAC’s) in southeastern Massachusetts have worked collaboratively with every branch of law enforcement and child protective services to provide a coordinated response to child trafficking. Often challenged with a greater understanding of the issue, we want to raise awareness of the terms, signs, and issues surrounding child trafficking, particularly in southeastern Massachusetts.

1. The Definition of Human Trafficking

Human trafficking is widely defined as “a crime that involves exploiting a person for labor, services, or commercial sex.” Massachusetts state law further defines the trafficking of children as the Commercial Sexual Exploitation of Children (CSEC). The CAC’s of Massachusetts recognize that CSEC occurs when a person under the age of 18 engages, agrees to engage, or offers to engage in sexual conduct with another person in return for a fee or an exchange of food, shelter, clothing, education, or care. Child sexual abuse material (child pornography) can also be considered a form of trafficking.

2. Exchange Doesn’t Always Involve Money

While money is used as an exchange for exploitation, we often see the exchange of basic needs, such as shelter, food or transportation to exploit children. Additionally, we have witnessed the exchange of substances, including alcohol, marijuana, and nicotine products (vaporizers) in our region. Lastly, the exchange for beauty products, such as eye-lash extensions, manicures, hair styling, and in-store purchased items of value, are being used for both boys, girls and transgendered youth as a means of sexual exploitation.

HumanTrafficking-Stats-AvgAge-600x252
3. Boys are Trafficked Too

There is a common misconception that girls are the only gender who are sexually exploited. Across the region, most of the sexually exploited youth have been identified as female. However, there have been an increasing number of male youths who have requested help or have been identified as victims. Similarly to other reports of abuse boys tend to under-report sexual exploitation too. By raising awareness that males are also victims of sexual exploitation, we hope to minimize the stigma of boys and young men requesting support and increase awareness for adults who can learn about the signs of exploitation in boys.

4. Human Trafficking Happens at Every Age

The average age of children (boys, girls and trans youth) we see being exploited in Southeast Massachusetts trends towards 13-years-old. However, children as young as 7 have been victims of trafficking. Additionally, trafficking does not end at 18, the exploitation continues as an adult.

5. Trafficking is in Your Town, and Maybe in Your Own Home

Human trafficking is not a far away issue, but one that is happening in our own back yards. Very often, children are exploited in their own homes, and in their own bedrooms, with their parents within reach. When children have access to technology, they can access and explore the world. In return, the world has access to them. With the onset of COVID-19 and more unsupervised time online, we have seen a dramatic increase in the exploitation of children online in this region. There has also been a regional surge in the creation and exploitation of child sexual abuse material (child pornography). Sometimes children are manipulated to create and send these images by online predators unknown to them. Other times, these images are self-produced and sent to peers. These images can then be shared without their knowledge or consent and can be used to exploit them more. At worse, these images can force a child into engaging in behaviors and actions they wouldn’t otherwise engage in or transition them into the world of in-person trafficking.

HumanTrafficking-Stats-Runaways-600x252
6. The Digital World Can Hide the Evidence

Children have the ability to create or access nearly an unlimited amount of social media profiles, fake email accounts, and online monetary exchanges such as CashApp, PayPal, and Venmo. These apps keep the evidence of exploitation hidden behind a mobile or internet-based device. We have seen an increasing trend of children being exploited over Snapchat, Instagram, Tik-Tok, Sugar-Daddy/Baby, and adult dating websites. The ability for an adult /exploiter to send money via an online service often makes it difficult for parents and caregivers to know that their children are receiving money in exchange for their exploitation online.

7. Trafficking Impacts All Backgrounds:

There is no one “profile” of a child who is exploited/trafficked. While there are some factors that lead to an increased risk, such as homelessness, in DCF custody/care, or living in residential group homes, trafficking impacts all backgrounds. Trafficking does not discriminate. Cases have originated from almost every town in the southeast region, regardless of economic status or geographical location. This has impacted our children everywhere from the smaller towns like Marion, Falmouth, and Dartmouth to the larger areas such as New Bedford, Fall River and Brockton. People who exploit children don’t care about their socioeconomic backgrounds; they simply care that they are children.

People who exploit children don’t care about their socioeconomic backgrounds; they simply care that they are children.”

8. Children Can’t Sell Themselves

We have heard cringeworthy language describing the exploitation of children. By law, a person under the age of 18 is a child. There’s no discussion here. A child cannot be a prostitute. In Massachusetts, by law, a child cannot consent to selling sexual content or acts. A child is not promiscuous. A child cannot “ask for it.” An adult is making the choice to purchase a child. An adult is making the choice to traffic or enable the exploitation of a child. An adult is committing a crime against a child. We need a significant change of language, and we need everyone to embrace holding adults who exploit or demean children accountable.

9. Exploitation is Being Normalized

Over the years, we have seen an increase in scary trends, which are pouring out into the futures of our children with nearly no breakers to the rising tide. “Sexting,” or sending sexually explicit text messages and images, has become a rapidly growing social norm for kids and teens. CashApp, Venmo and Paypal links are in children’s social media bio’s more than their ages or pet names. The rise of Sugardaddy and Sugarbaby websites are waiting for children the day they turn 18, and OnlyFans accounts and websites have an age verification system on par with a “click here.” Children are being inundated with social media personalities selling their images every day. Media plays a large role in reinforcing this behavior in children. What’s more, the buyers of these images and behaviors online are encouraged and hailed as nearly philanthropic. The nuances of adult versus child exploitation are fading away.

10. It Doesn’t Have to be This Way

There is a myth that everyday people cannot do anything about human and child trafficking, and it is false. Everyone can do their part to raise awareness of the issue. You can reach out to your local Children’s Advocacy Center and ask how you can learn more about the issue, or request a training for your local community, school, or child serving organization or business. You can report suspicious behaviors to your local CAC, law enforcement agency or file a report with the Department of Children and Families if you have concerns that a child is being exploited. If you see or suspect child sexual abuse material online or on social media, you can report it to the National Center for Missing and Exploited Children. You don’t need to know who the exploiter is; he or she can be unknown to you–what’s important is that you make the report.

As a parent, we want you to have the conversation with your children about body and online safety. You can set ground rules for internet usage and access. You can have these difficult conversations about online exploitation with your children and start when they are young. Most of all, believe children if they make a report, advocate for children in having their needs met, and always focus on the health, wellness and safety of children in our community.

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Filed Under: OUR TAKE

Community Partners – Knights of Columbus

January 19, 2021 by Jacob Stapledon

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Community Partners – Knights of Columbus

Jacob Stapledon

January 19, 2021

As we forge through these colder months wearing our winter coats, we want to highlight a wonderful community partner and their contribution to warmth over the years: the Knights of Columbus. Since 2016, Knights of Columbus have donated more than 100 coats to the Children’s Cove families through their Coats for Kids program, and we are forever grateful.

Richard Kijak, Grand Knight, has coordinated the collection and drop of coats for the last two years. Prior to that, Henry and Gayle McClean served in that role. Working with Family Advocate Melanie Sachs, they reached out to the families we support every fall to see who may need winter coats, knowing that needs change over time, especially during 2020.

Coats donated for Children's Cove families.
Coats donated for Children's Cove families.

This past holiday season, the Knights of Columbus and a few private donors we were able to provide new winter coats for 20 families and 45 children in need, from infants to teenagers. These families described the amazing feeling they had to be able to give warm coats to their children. For those who have experienced dramatic changes in their lives, particularly from trauma, the little things can often become the big things.

Thank you to the Knights of Columbus, as well as Richard, Henry and Gayle, who we have worked with over the years. You make a difference!

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Filed Under: COMMUNITY

The need for communication this holiday season

December 13, 2020 by Jacob Stapledon

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The need for communication this holiday season

Jacob Stapledon

December 13, 2020

For many, this year’s holiday season has dramatically shifted away from the norm. Whether this means more work, or less, it undoubtably causes stress. While the holiday season is often one of joy, sharing, family and love, many children and families who have experienced trauma face additional challenges. The realities of many types of loss, combined with the whirlwind and varying impacts of COVID-19, may make it difficult to see the wonder of the season. However, there are ways to make this holiday season meaningful, less stressful, and joyful this year.

As with any topic that causes anxiety, the first step is to talk about it. Depending on if you have very young children who don’t understand all the differences this year may bring, or you have older children who do, this conversation may be very different. For young children, it may not involve them more than simply explaining that some traditions may be different. The details don’t matter as much as clearly communicating and then adding in something they will get to experience as an excitement. For older children, it may be helpful for your family to talk about how everyone is feeling. Understanding and communicating fears, hopes, frustrations and anticipation may help everyone come together for a common goal. Perhaps there are traditions that can be continued that will mean even more. There may be something that holds an importance you hadn’t realized. Or, if there are some things that just can’t happen, or can’t be fixed, expressing your sadness and frustration may help your children reconcile their own feelings. Communication and transparency can help the connection with your children and move toward the things that bring joy.

To support your children in the holiday season, you must first support yourself; much like the oxygen mask on an airplane, if you can’t breathe, you can’t help another.”

Another critical component this season is self-care. Parents and caregivers often take on the frustration, anger, sadness and disappointment of their children during loss, trauma and grief. For those with younger children, the realization of what your children are going to miss out on feels like an extra burden when making what they can experience that much more special. To support your children in the holiday season, you must first support yourself; much like the oxygen mask on an airplane, if you can’t breathe, you can’t help another.

Carve out time for yourself, identify what is going to make you happy and help you relax. Don’t put this off! Self-care practices are often the first to go after what can be even a minor inconvenience. Identify at least one activity (something you do, not take, eat or drink) that calms you down, releases anxiety or frustration, and practice it daily. Double doses of self-care are recommended. Talk with your partner, family or friends about what you look forward to in the holiday season and find something you know will bring you joy.

The National Child Traumatic Stress Network has put together a guide for parents in navigating this holiday season with children and teens. Their resources, suggestions and tools may help you find that “ah-ha!” moment in supporting your family’s holiday.

Happy Holidays from all of us at Children’s Cove

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Filed Under: OUR TAKE

Community Partners – Harbor Church, Massachusetts Maritime Academy Student Athlete Advisory Committee

December 13, 2020 by Jacob Stapledon

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It Takes a Community

Jacob Stapledon

December 13, 2020

Although this year has been unprecedented and different, one thing has remained constant: the impact our partners in the community make. We want to highlight a handful of the essential partnerships we’ve had for several years, including Harbor Church in Hyannis and Massachusetts Maritime Academy and the Student Athlete Advisory Committee (SAAC) in Buzzards Bay. These two organizations have contributed to the holiday season being filled with abundance, thanks, and joy for more than 175 families and nearly 300 children who have been victims of sexual abuse. One of the most vital elements of the spirit we carry at Children’s Cove is that, even after trauma, children can enjoy healthy, safe, and empowered lives. Our friends at Harbor and MMA help us bring that vision to life.

Boxes of Thanksgiving food items and extras from Harbor Church.
Boxes of Thanksgiving food items and extras from Harbor Church.

In the early Fall 2016, our Family Advocate gave a tour to some members of the Harbor Church, after which they asked, “How can we help?” This led to the first year in which members of the community put together full holiday meals with extra fixings, cooking utensils, and handmade cards for our team to give to families in need we’d supported that year. Since then, Harbor has doubled the amount of families they support each year and have encouraged members of their community to give back in incredible ways. We’d like to recognize and give a special thank you to Katie Rose Richie and Allison Warner, who have coordinated with Melanie the last four years in making this an annual event.

Members of Children’s Cove and MMA SAAC from 2019
Members of Children’s Cove and MMA SAAC from 2019

Another organization with tradition of annual giving and impact is the Massachusetts Maritime Academy Student Athlete Advisory Committee (MMA SAAC). For nearly 10 years, MMA SAAC has provided a collection of new toys and gifts for children who are seen at Children’s Cove. Every one of those years, like clockwork, they have delivered us a van (or two) full of toys to help Children’s Cove families. The student leaders at MMA have always demonstrated the inherent values of the institutions they represent, including honor, responsibility, discipline, and leadership. They have not only gathered and solicited donations from their communities, but they have also understood and communicated the mission, vision and values of Children’s Cove. By talking about these important issues and recognizing that a conversation is just as important as a donation, we may be making a difference for the future in mitigating the stigma of childhood trauma.

Members of MMA SAAC from 2017

Over the last few years, MMA SAAC has helped nearly 250 children to have a joyful and fun holiday season. Because of the pandemic and limitation this year, the MMA SAAC, and our contacts Joe Malkin, Student-Athlete Advisory Committee Advisor, and Student Athletes George Lampros and Lucia Buzzell have chosen to “pivot” and approach family support differently. In lieu of the annual toy drive, we will be sending out gift cards to families who have come through the Cove recently, and, on an as-needed basis, to families who have walked through our doors in the last few years. Our goal is to take the burden off caregivers this holiday season and to provide smiles to children and teens who have received our services.

There is still hope and healing to carry into this holiday season. We are thankful to our generous and caring community partners for their support and for sharing in our vision to create a community where children are free of abuse, have a voice that is heard, and where they can enjoy healthy, safe, and empowered lives.

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Filed Under: COMMUNITY

When “remote” isn’t safe for children

October 19, 2020 by Jacob Stapledon

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When “remote” isn’t safe for children

Jacob Stapledon

October 19, 2020

Even before COVID-19 turned our lives upside down, many, if not most, of us were suffering from TMI – Too Much Information. 24/7 cable news networks, social media, emails, YouTube, and yes even this newsletter – it’s impossible to process it all. And now, in a society compelled to connect online much more frequently, TMI has only been exacerbated.

Yet, there is still vital information worth our focus.

Here’s one: children and teens are online more than ever, especially with in-school-instruction being severely curtailed and the rise of remote-learning. Research has shown that 1 in 5 children will experience unwanted sexual content/solicitation online. Even prior to the pandemic, The Internet Crimes Against Children Task Force reported these numbers were on the rise. Immediately after restrictions and shelter-in-place advisories were declared in March, the FBI issued a national warning that children being pushed towards remote learning and more unrestricted time on the internet carried the potential for more online enticement and exploitation.

Wait. Let’s take a step back. What is online enticement/exploitation?

Here is how the National Center for Missing and Exploited Children (NCMEC) defines it:

Online Enticement involves an individual communicating with someone believed to be a child via the internet with the intent to commit a sexual offense or abduction. This is a broad category of online exploitation and includes sextortion, in which a child is being groomed to take sexually explicit images and/or ultimately meet face-to-face with someone for sexual purposes, or to engage in a sexual conversation online or, in some instances, to sell/trade the child’s sexual images.”

Consider this: with the national shut-down, not only did it lead our youth to spending more time online, online predators now have more hidden and direct access to our children.

Locally, we have seen a surge in reports for sexual exploitation cases on the Cape & Islands, some of which leads to the commercial sexual exploitation of children, what we in child advocacy profession refer to as CSEC. Since July 1st we have received more than half the number of our total referrals from the previous year. If this trend continues, we could see up to a 120% increase in sexual exploitation referrals, a trend being seen elsewhere across the country.

The good news: parents and caregivers can make a huge difference in reducing these numbers. How? First: get involved! It may seem uncomfortable and overwhelming at first but what’s happening in your child’s online world is important. There are courses parents and caregivers can enroll in offered by the organization National Online Safety that can assist you in understanding what you need to know.

Second, talk regularly with your children about body safety and how that extends into their online activities. Creating an environment of trust and open communication about topics which may seem difficult will make it more likely your child will talk to you if something happens.

And please don’t forget to use the tips and resources found here.

Lastly, be on the lookout for our upcoming campaign to counter this troubling digital development.

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Filed Under: ONLINE SAFETY

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